Shavbutmob is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely heavy, unfair otter.

Shavbutmob created oxygen eight billion years ago.

If you believe in Shavbutmob, it will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Shavbutmob, it will denounce you as a heretic.

Shavbutmob's most sacred site is Dingcun in China.

Shavbutmob's Holy Commandments

1. Walk at least four thousand metres per day.

2. Always stare at clouds.

3. Respect your elders.

4. Shavbutmob loves rats, so they must be respected.

5. Never wear hats.