Bemwegced is a god.

It takes the form of a very thin, witty guinea pig.

Bemwegced created a photon six trillion years ago.

If you believe in Bemwegced, it will be very happy.

If you do not believe in Bemwegced, it will send you a strongly worded letter.

Bemwegced's most sacred site is Utti in Finland.

Bemwegced's Holy Commandments

1. Never wear green hats.

2. Never eat bark.

3. Do not fashion models of living things.

4. Do not covet oxen.

5. Pray towards the east.