Citlidwodpitsom is a god.

He takes the form of a five thousand metre long, weak wren.

Citlidwodpitsom created a strange quark eighteen thousand years ago.

If you believe in Citlidwodpitsom, he will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Citlidwodpitsom, he will jump up and down fuming with anger.

Citlidwodpitsom's most sacred site is Alyki in Greece.

Citlidwodpitsom's Holy Commandments

1. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

2. Never mention turtles.

3. Always obey Citlidwodpitsom's priests.

4. Never hurt seals.

5. Always pray in complete darkness.