Dadyatthab is a god.

It takes the form of a four thousand metre long, grumpy penguin.

Dadyatthab created the planet Mars two billion years ago.

If you believe in Dadyatthab, it will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Dadyatthab, it will name a particularly small and pointless comet after you.

Dadyatthab's most sacred site is Ulsted in Denmark.

Dadyatthab's Holy Commandments

1. Paint representations of stars on the walls of your dwelling place in red.

2. Never go into mauve rooms.

3. Retreat if nine eagles approach from the south.

4. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Dadyatthab.

5. Fast once a month.