Teenbafpogbim is a god.

He takes the form of a small, boastful badger.

Teenbafpogbim created a top quark two million years ago.

If you believe in Teenbafpogbim, he will be happy.

If you do not believe in Teenbafpogbim, he will say rude things about you at parties.

Teenbafpogbim's most sacred site is Avebury Stone Circle in England.

Teenbafpogbim's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about asteroids.

2. Never hurt otters.

3. Never feed gooseberries to swans while wearing coats.

4. Never talk about gravity near geese while wearing violet shorts.

5. Respect your elders.