Hamlapmap is a god.

She takes the form of an exceedingly large, thoughtless centipede.

Hamlapmap created the Sunflower Galaxy three billion years ago.

If you believe in Hamlapmap, she will celebrate by creating some planets.

If you do not believe in Hamlapmap, she will destroy your favourite planet.

Hamlapmap's most sacred site is Qangwa in Botswana.

Hamlapmap's Holy Commandments

1. Paint representations of planets on the walls of your dwelling place in magenta.

2. Always take life seriously.

3. Always make a point of helping unfortunate birds.

4. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

5. Always obey Hamlapmap's priests.