Fagfigfubhun is a god.

He takes the form of a six hundred metre long, unjust fish.

Fagfigfubhun created energy nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Fagfigfubhun, he will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Fagfigfubhun, he will ignore you and hope you go away.

Fagfigfubhun's most sacred site is Goldcliff in Wales.

Fagfigfubhun's Holy Commandments

1. Always help badgers.

2. Do not wear iron on your body.

3. Always make sure there are no capybaras in a room before entering it.

4. Always make sure there are no foxes in a building before entering it.

5. Always pray in complete darkness.