Sascinzod is a god.

It takes the form of a six thousand metre long, ruthless snail.

Sascinzod created the planet Earth five quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Sascinzod, it will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Sascinzod, it will send four elderly elephants to rub you out.

Sascinzod's most sacred site is Polydrosos in Greece.

Sascinzod's Holy Commandments

1. Hide from cyan frogs for they are unholy.

2. Do not drink from vessels made of aluminium.

3. Never look in ponds.

4. Learn six new languages a year.

5. Never write about asteroids.