Yattvanmot is a god.

It takes the form of a three thousand metre long, fast eagle.

Yattvanmot created snails three billion years ago.

If you believe in Yattvanmot, it will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Yattvanmot, it will turn you into a small brown duck.

Yattvanmot's most sacred site is Chettipet in India.

Yattvanmot's Holy Commandments

1. Show mercy to disobedient children.

2. Never wear scarves.

3. Do not trade with those who eat cucumbers.

4. Do not wear fawn clothing.

5. Never write about stars.