Teentarpspag is a god.

She takes the form of a fat, cheerful jackal.

Teentarpspag created vertebrates six million years ago.

If you believe in Teentarpspag, she will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Teentarpspag, she will turn you into a small brown duck.

Teentarpspag's most sacred site is Katteri in India.

Teentarpspag's Holy Commandments

1. Never mention aardvarks.

2. Run away if four bats approach from the south.

3. Never talk about stars.

4. Run away from pink voles, for they are unholy.

5. Do not listen to heathen tongues.