Wanliphun is a god.

She takes the form of a huge, caring hydra.

Wanliphun created a bottom quark four quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Wanliphun, she will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Wanliphun, she will turn you into a dog.

Wanliphun's most sacred site is Laurila in Finland.

Wanliphun's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about the weak nuclear force.

2. Put Wanliphun first in all things.

3. Always help manatees in need.

4. Do not make images of living things.

5. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.