Gumnilquill Metbelltaldod is a god.

He takes the form of an exceedingly large, selfish weasel.

Gumnilquill Metbelltaldod created an electron two quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Gumnilquill Metbelltaldod, he will give you the power of flight.

If you do not believe in Gumnilquill Metbelltaldod, he will turn you into a rat.

Gumnilquill Metbelltaldod's most sacred site is Aguaruto in Mexico.

Gumnilquill Metbelltaldod's Holy Commandments

1. Always help hamsters in need.

2. Do not wear red clothing.

3. Erect three aluminium sculptures of Gumnilquill Metbelltaldod on top of important buildings.

4. Erect a giant green sculpture of Gumnilquill Metbelltaldod in the centre of the settlement.

5. Erect a giant zinc sculpture of Gumnilquill Metbelltaldod in the centre of the settlement.