Tipxemjap is a god.

She takes the form of a very small, temperamental crow.

Tipxemjap created a charm quark five trillion years ago.

If you believe in Tipxemjap, she will celebrate by creating some planets.

If you do not believe in Tipxemjap, she will try to impress you with trees.

Tipxemjap's most sacred site is Polagam in India.

Tipxemjap's Holy Commandments

1. Walk at least nine thousand metres per day.

2. Show mercy to disobedient children.

3. Never eat bark.

4. Always make sure there are no rats in a room before entering it.

5. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.