Lophasdoss is a god.

It takes the form of a four thousand metre long, weak hare.

Lophasdoss created an electron five billion years ago.

If you believe in Lophasdoss, it will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Lophasdoss, it will throw large rocks at you.

Lophasdoss' most sacred site is Xaaga in Mexico.

Lophasdoss' Holy Commandments

1. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

2. You must never eat parsnips.

3. Never think about quantum mechanics.

4. Never feed spinach to hamsters while wearing corsets.

5. Do not hurt porpoises.