Nilwanyiknigcanven is a god.

He takes the form of a slender, self-confident camel.

Nilwanyiknigcanven created a quark six quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Nilwanyiknigcanven, he will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Nilwanyiknigcanven, he will strike you with lightening.

Nilwanyiknigcanven's most sacred site is Camon in France.

Nilwanyiknigcanven's Holy Commandments

1. Run away from turquoise manatees, for they are unholy.

2. Never talk about optics near hamsters while wearing indigo shoes and balancing seven aluminium spheres on your back.

3. Never talk about shrews.

4. Walk at least three thousand metres per day.

5. Do not keep eight snails in a large pit.