Cinstaflistligbumdibort is a god.

He takes the form of a three hundred metre long, moody snake.

Cinstaflistligbumdibort created the solar system six billion years ago.

If you believe in Cinstaflistligbumdibort, he will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Cinstaflistligbumdibort, he will laugh at you.

Cinstaflistligbumdibort's most sacred site is Nuorgam in Finland.

Cinstaflistligbumdibort's Holy Commandments

1. Never think ill of sick frogs.

2. Do not kill squirrels.

3. Never think about the strong nuclear force near bats while wearing green scarves and balancing six nickel spheres on your feet.

4. Do not chop down trees.

5. Always make sure there are no eagles in a building before entering it.