Cepnartdoss is a god.

He takes the form of an exceedingly fat, blissful jackal.

Cepnartdoss created a down quark eight thousand years ago.

If you believe in Cepnartdoss, he will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Cepnartdoss, he will not invite you to parties.

Cepnartdoss' most sacred site is Taktser in China.

Cepnartdoss' Holy Commandments

1. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

2. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Cepnartdoss.

3. Never talk about spacetime near bats while wearing blue jumpers.

4. Never feed lemons to tortoises while wearing tights.

5. Do not wear brown clothing.