Lopsandfed is a god.

She takes the form of a five hundred metre long, idiotic centaur.

Lopsandfed created the Large Magellanic Cloud nine million years ago.

If you believe in Lopsandfed, she will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Lopsandfed, she will think nothing of it.

Lopsandfed's most sacred site is Pandamatenga in Botswana.

Lopsandfed's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about planets.

2. Respect your elders.

3. Never paint your feet fawn.

4. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

5. Hide from turquoise horses for they are unholy.