Citstafbon is a god.

He takes the form of a nine hundred metre long, kind monkey.

Citstafbon created light three million years ago.

If you believe in Citstafbon, he will be happy.

If you do not believe in Citstafbon, he will send three marmosets to sort you out.

Citstafbon's most sacred site is Randers in Denmark.

Citstafbon's Holy Commandments

1. Do not cook food in pots.

2. Never think about optics near cats while wearing black ear rings and balancing eight titanium spheres on your arms.

3. Never mention bats.

4. Worship no other gods but Citstafbon.

5. Never talk about nebulae.