Vigjenbad is a god.

She takes the form of a rotund, bad-tempered goblin.

Vigjenbad created the Cigar Galaxy seven billion years ago.

If you believe in Vigjenbad, she will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Vigjenbad, she will send two she bears to sort you out.

Vigjenbad's most sacred site is Miiluranta in Finland.

Vigjenbad's Holy Commandments

1. Do not commit murder.

2. Never wear cyan tights.

3. Look mercifully on unfortunate aardvarks.

4. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

5. Never think about dark energy.