Tapbomkar is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely thin, slow elephant.

Tapbomkar created everything that exists seven million years ago.

If you believe in Tapbomkar, it will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Tapbomkar, it will destroy your home planet.

Tapbomkar's most sacred site is Chilhac in France.

Tapbomkar's Holy Commandments

1. Erect a giant pink sculpture of Tapbomkar in the centre of the settlement.

2. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

3. Never look at nebulae.

4. Always pray immersed in water.

5. Do not make images of living things.