Mitbidmob is a god.

She takes the form of an eight hundred metre long, omnipotent duck.

Mitbidmob created the Milkyway seven trillion years ago.

If you believe in Mitbidmob, she will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Mitbidmob, she will send you a strongly worded letter.

Mitbidmob's most sacred site is Poloka in Botswana.

Mitbidmob's Holy Commandments

1. Always help sick squirrels.

2. Do not speak about corn.

3. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

4. Never pour water over plants.

5. Never think about the weak nuclear force near dolphins while wearing magenta shoes and balancing six iron spheres on your hands.