Tifcebjin is a god.

She takes the form of a fat, slow hippopotamus.

Tifcebjin created energy five billion years ago.

If you believe in Tifcebjin, she will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Tifcebjin, she will attempt to scare you with floods.

Tifcebjin's most sacred site is Ringsted in Denmark.

Tifcebjin's Holy Commandments

1. Pray towards the east.

2. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

3. Paint representations of dwarf planets on the walls of your dwelling place in purple.

4. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

5. Feed all hungry foxes.