Wegzogmeg is a god.

It takes the form of a three hundred metre long, deceitful centipede.

Wegzogmeg created humankind nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Wegzogmeg, it will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Wegzogmeg, it will send two she bears to sort you out.

Wegzogmeg's most sacred site is Gulval in England.

Wegzogmeg's Holy Commandments

1. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

2. Show mercy to disobedient children.

3. Do not wear white clothing.

4. Never jump in the presence of capybaras.

5. Never paint your chest mauve.