Flambessbun Nulfomhat is a god.

She takes the form of a heavy, tranquil snake.

Flambessbun Nulfomhat created Europe two billion years ago.

If you believe in Flambessbun Nulfomhat, she will be very happy.

If you do not believe in Flambessbun Nulfomhat, she will turn you into a slug.

Flambessbun Nulfomhat's most sacred site is Ifaty in Madagascar.

Flambessbun Nulfomhat's Holy Commandments

1. Always obey Flambessbun Nulfomhat's priests.

2. Never eat bark.

3. Do not take Flambessbun Nulfomhat's name in vain.

4. Show mercy to disobedient children.

5. Never talk about moons.