Arfbepwee is a god.

It takes the form of a galaxy-sized, proud crane.

Arfbepwee created an up quark eight quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Arfbepwee, it will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Arfbepwee, it will turn you into a rock.

Arfbepwee's most sacred site is Miiluranta in Finland.

Arfbepwee's Holy Commandments

1. Paint representations of asteroids on the walls of your dwelling place in white.

2. Do not shave your arms.

3. Erect four gold sculptures of Arfbepwee on top of important buildings.

4. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

5. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.