Pitflamvil is a god.

It takes the form of a giant, narcissistic hamster.

Pitflamvil created dark matter nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Pitflamvil, it will be very happy.

If you do not believe in Pitflamvil, it will not care at all.

Pitflamvil's most sacred site is Bodieve in England.

Pitflamvil's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about quantum mechanics.

2. Look mercifully on unfortunate cats.

3. Never talk about monkeys.

4. Always pray immersed in water.

5. Never think about thermodynamics.