Cedbesscip is a god.

He takes the form of a fat, confident newt.

Cedbesscip created a charm quark three billion years ago.

If you believe in Cedbesscip, he will not care.

If you do not believe in Cedbesscip, he will hide angry queen hornets in your dwelling place.

Cedbesscip's most sacred site is Phepheng in Botswana.

Cedbesscip's Holy Commandments

1. Look mercifully on unfortunate tapirs.

2. Your children must be taught to worship Cedbesscip.

3. Never talk about quantum field theory.

4. Whales are unholy and should not be approached.

5. Do not eat pineapples.