Gupbenlag is a god.

She takes the form of a rotund, two-faced hummingbird.

Gupbenlag created the universe nine thousand years ago.

If you believe in Gupbenlag, she will be happy.

If you do not believe in Gupbenlag, she will destroy your favourite star.

Gupbenlag's most sacred site is Ilmola in Finland.

Gupbenlag's Holy Commandments

1. Do not chop down trees.

2. Do not make images of living things.

3. Never talk about the strong nuclear force near cats while wearing purple corsets and balancing four copper spheres on your neck.

4. Do not drink alcohol.

5. Walk at least six thousand metres per day.