Fobcunvad is a god.

She takes the form of a slim, strong cow.

Fobcunvad created the planet Venus five quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Fobcunvad, she will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Fobcunvad, she will jump up and down fuming with rage.

Fobcunvad's most sacred site is Dornbock in Germany.

Fobcunvad's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat cucumbers.

2. Learn nine new languages a year.

3. Always take life seriously.

4. Never think ill of sick doves.

5. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.