Flanpodmet is a god.

She takes the form of a slim, ill-tempered pigeon.

Flanpodmet created time and space seven billion years ago.

If you believe in Flanpodmet, she will be surprised.

If you do not believe in Flanpodmet, she will curse you and those you beget for fifty two trillion years.

Flanpodmet's most sacred site is Sirama in Madagascar.

Flanpodmet's Holy Commandments

1. Never wear coats.

2. Do not drink alcohol.

3. Erect a giant gray sculpture of Flanpodmet in the centre of the settlement.

4. Always treat badgers with great respect.

5. Hide from magenta whales for they are unholy.
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