Quagnarstan Cumcenced is a god.

He takes the form of a slim, competent mongoose.

Quagnarstan Cumcenced created a down quark nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Quagnarstan Cumcenced, he will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Quagnarstan Cumcenced, he will strike you with lightening.

Quagnarstan Cumcenced's most sacred site is Xaaga in Mexico.

Quagnarstan Cumcenced's Holy Commandments

1. Do not commit murder.

2. Do not covet oxen.

3. Respect your elders.

4. Do not make images of living things.

5. Always obey Quagnarstan Cumcenced's priests.