Wigcapcit is a god.

He takes the form of a blubbery, quiet finch.

Wigcapcit created humanity seven trillion years ago.

If you believe in Wigcapcit, he will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Wigcapcit, he will cry a lot.

Wigcapcit's most sacred site is Manakuppam in India.

Wigcapcit's Holy Commandments

1. Do not shave your feet.

2. Never feed figs to shrews while wearing pink skirts.

3. Draw representations of stars on the walls of your dwelling place.

4. Never feed parsnips to ants while wearing coats.

5. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.