Tailpinnull Honyamkar is a god.

She takes the form of a plump, uncaring porpoise.

Tailpinnull Honyamkar created Asia five million years ago.

If you believe in Tailpinnull Honyamkar, she will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Tailpinnull Honyamkar, she will destroy your favourite solar system.

Tailpinnull Honyamkar's most sacred site is Cusihuiriachi in Mexico.

Tailpinnull Honyamkar's Holy Commandments

1. Respect your elders.

2. Never look at moons.

3. Never eat bark.

4. Never feed oranges to snails while wearing ear rings.

5. Always help mites in need.