Sterjaptar Cumvaddap is a god.

He takes the form of a three hundred metre long, duplicitous swallow.

Sterjaptar Cumvaddap created tapeworms nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Sterjaptar Cumvaddap, he will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Sterjaptar Cumvaddap, he will send twenty two thousand, three hundred, and seventy eight badgers to sort you out.

Sterjaptar Cumvaddap's most sacred site is Neravy in India.

Sterjaptar Cumvaddap's Holy Commandments

1. Never wear blue trousers.

2. Erect six silicon sculptures of Sterjaptar Cumvaddap on top of important buildings.

3. Never wear coats.

4. Do not skip in public.

5. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.