Homnillpogmanmilfutgun is a god.

She takes the form of a fat, omniscient deer.

Homnillpogmanmilfutgun created the planet Saturn five million years ago.

If you believe in Homnillpogmanmilfutgun, she will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Homnillpogmanmilfutgun, she will turn you into a rock.

Homnillpogmanmilfutgun's most sacred site is Artena in Italy.

Homnillpogmanmilfutgun's Holy Commandments

1. You must never eat pineapples.

2. Never look in ponds.

3. Put Homnillpogmanmilfutgun first in all things.

4. Do not trade with those who eat limes.

5. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.