Tailbugran is a god.

He takes the form of a four hundred metre long, able wasp.

Tailbugran created viruses five quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Tailbugran, he will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Tailbugran, he will jump up and down fuming with anger.

Tailbugran's most sacred site is Hongcun in China.

Tailbugran's Holy Commandments

1. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

2. Erect four gold sculptures of Tailbugran on top of important buildings.

3. You must pray to Tailbugran eight times a day.

4. Never eat bark.

5. Never talk about dark energy near great tits while wearing magenta stockings.