Wadnelmat is a god.

She takes the form of an exceedingly fat, conceited rhinoceros.

Wadnelmat created the world nine million years ago.

If you believe in Wadnelmat, she will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Wadnelmat, she will curse you with boils.

Wadnelmat's most sacred site is Metsimotlhabe in Botswana.

Wadnelmat's Holy Commandments

1. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

2. Do not kill foxes.

3. Never write about black holes.

4. Pray towards the west.

5. Never feed peas to tortoises while wearing shoes.