Jen is a god.

He takes the form of a seven thousand metre long, impressive crow.

Jen created a bottom quark two trillion years ago.

If you believe in Jen, he will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Jen, he will boil you in a big pot.

Jen's most sacred site is Chettipet in India.

Jen's Holy Commandments

1. Worship no other gods but Jen.

2. Never feed figs to moths while wearing coats.

3. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

4. Always stare at clouds.

5. Learn six new languages a year.