Ominnutsis Quilllarpmetfaspaksisfemvan is a god.

She takes the form of a planet-sized, passionate duck.

Ominnutsis Quilllarpmetfaspaksisfemvan created the Sombrero Galaxy three hundred thousand years ago.

If you believe in Ominnutsis Quilllarpmetfaspaksisfemvan, she will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Ominnutsis Quilllarpmetfaspaksisfemvan, she will turn you into a mole.

Ominnutsis Quilllarpmetfaspaksisfemvan's most sacred site is Corsock in Scotland.

Ominnutsis Quilllarpmetfaspaksisfemvan's Holy Commandments

1. Do not dye your hair orange.

2. You must never eat garlic.

3. Always help shrews.

4. Respect your elders.

5. Do not shave your neck.