Baflenlarp is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely small, confident cat.

Baflenlarp created dark matter eight thousand years ago.

If you believe in Baflenlarp, it will not care.

If you do not believe in Baflenlarp, it will turn you into a mouse.

Baflenlarp's most sacred site is Auvillar in France.

Baflenlarp's Holy Commandments

1. Always help sick foxes.

2. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

3. Do not commit murder.

4. Do not shave your hands.

5. Do not kill goats.