Cetlidsag is a god.

She takes the form of a thin, compassionate crane.

Cetlidsag created vertebrates seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Cetlidsag, she will not care.

If you do not believe in Cetlidsag, she will turn you into a sparrow.

Cetlidsag's most sacred site is Syndendro in Greece.

Cetlidsag's Holy Commandments

1. Learn seven new languages a year.

2. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

3. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

4. Walk at least five thousand metres per day.

5. Do not dye your hair red.