Kamwigqueeg is a god.

He takes the form of a plump, witty yak.

Kamwigqueeg created snails two trillion years ago.

If you believe in Kamwigqueeg, he will not care.

If you do not believe in Kamwigqueeg, he will send you a strongly worded letter.

Kamwigqueeg's most sacred site is Gohrau in Germany.

Kamwigqueeg's Holy Commandments

1. Your children must be taught to worship Kamwigqueeg.

2. Always pray immersed in water.

3. Never wear corsets.

4. Paint representations of asteroids on the walls of your dwelling place in blue.

5. You must pray to Kamwigqueeg three times a day.