Karnelcam Cankombad Dobrilkan is a god.

It takes the form of a two thousand metre long, able goblin.

Karnelcam Cankombad Dobrilkan created viruses four quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Karnelcam Cankombad Dobrilkan, it will grant you five wishes.

If you do not believe in Karnelcam Cankombad Dobrilkan, it will refuse to believe in you.

Karnelcam Cankombad Dobrilkan's most sacred site is Oitti in Finland.

Karnelcam Cankombad Dobrilkan's Holy Commandments

1. Walk at least eight thousand metres per day.

2. Never bounce in the presence of snails.

3. Never wear magenta corsets.

4. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

5. Never talk about fire.