Poparpnurtmot is a god.

He takes the form of a very fat, ruthless slug.

Poparpnurtmot created tapeworms six trillion years ago.

If you believe in Poparpnurtmot, he will grant you five wishes.

If you do not believe in Poparpnurtmot, he will send twenty eight swans to peck you to death.

Poparpnurtmot's most sacred site is Manna in Greece.

Poparpnurtmot's Holy Commandments

1. Always look after injured grasshopers.

2. Tortoises are not to be trusted.

3. Never think about cell theory.

4. Run away if three pigs approach from the east.

5. You must pray to Poparpnurtmot five times a day.