Bellpakfarnnat is a god.

It takes the form of a small, blissful deer.

Bellpakfarnnat created an atom eight million years ago.

If you believe in Bellpakfarnnat, it will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Bellpakfarnnat, it will jump up and down fuming with anger.

Bellpakfarnnat's most sacred site is Bogogobo in Botswana.

Bellpakfarnnat's Holy Commandments

1. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

2. Always take life seriously.

3. Do not eat garlic.

4. Do not shave your legs.

5. Always pray in complete darkness.