Vilmatflap is a god.

He takes the form of a large, egotistical lion.

Vilmatflap created dark energy three billion years ago.

If you believe in Vilmatflap, he will be happy.

If you do not believe in Vilmatflap, he will hide angry, poisonous spiders in your dwelling place.

Vilmatflap's most sacred site is Basalorum in Sweden.

Vilmatflap's Holy Commandments

1. Put Vilmatflap first in all things.

2. Paint representations of asteroids on the walls of your dwelling place.

3. Never feed lots of bananas to swans while wearing yellow shirts.

4. You must love Vilmatflap.

5. Never eat green fruit.