Yatmonhud is a god.

It takes the form of a slender, unsympathetic scorpion.

Yatmonhud created parasitic wasps nine thousand years ago.

If you believe in Yatmonhud, it will celebrate by creating some planets.

If you do not believe in Yatmonhud, it will turn you into a hamster.

Yatmonhud's most sacred site is Qangwa in Botswana.

Yatmonhud's Holy Commandments

1. Never feed peas to great tits while wearing red shoes.

2. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

3. Never bounce in holy places.

4. Yatmonhud loves horses, so they must be honoured.

5. Hide from brown sharks for they are unholy.