Jarnnartyar is a god.

It takes the form of a three thousand metre long, strong weasel.

Jarnnartyar created dark energy four trillion years ago.

If you believe in Jarnnartyar, it will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Jarnnartyar, it will attempt to scare you with strong winds.

Jarnnartyar's most sacred site is Vinezac in France.

Jarnnartyar's Holy Commandments

1. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

2. Do not chop down trees.

3. Do not cook food in pots.

4. Hide from purple foxes for they are unholy.

5. Do not dye your hair cyan.