Cabsandjab is a god.

She takes the form of a giant, irritating ferret.

Cabsandjab created Africa seven trillion years ago.

If you believe in Cabsandjab, she will grant you five wishes.

If you do not believe in Cabsandjab, she will destroy your home planet.

Cabsandjab's most sacred site is Gorslas in Wales.

Cabsandjab's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about stars.

2. Do not make images of living things.

3. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

4. Put Cabsandjab first in all things.

5. Fast once a month.
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